If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
