I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
