Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
She swung at the pinata with crutches
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Randomize
