my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
