This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Randomize
