i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
