Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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