come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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