Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
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