Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
