Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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