I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
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