A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
