It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
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