whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
