My balls are so social today.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Alive.
So much puke
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
