Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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