let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
