Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
