people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
