just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
