K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
