im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
