Old men and throwing up are my life now.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
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