We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize