At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
3 2 1 whiskey
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
