i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I enjoy the company of your penis
Randomize
