That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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