My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I can't turn off my feet"
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
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