I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
