The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
