Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Randomize
