i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
