We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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