Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I'm getting married
To pizza
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
jump out the window naked night went bad
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