Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
im holly from the hills drunk
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
