I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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