How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
