Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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