Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Randomize
