I'm drive I can fine osifer
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Randomize
