its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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