do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Randomize
