I like my sex mixed with concussions.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
