i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
