I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
