don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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