Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
