Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Randomize
