Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
send nudes
from the living room?
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize
