I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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