Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize